Archives for April 2020

Thinking of You, NYC

April 16, 2020 | Leave a Comment

In December, while on our short hiatus from blogging, I went to New York City with my family. It was my first time in the Big Apple and I could hardly wait. We flew into LaGuardia airport, took a taxi into Manhattan, and stayed at the Edison Hotel, which is steps away from Times Square and the Theatre District.

The food in NYC was incredible. In the lobby of our hotel was a bustling diner called Friedman’s. We ate there daily. We also enjoyed authentic Italian dining at Carmine’s, yummy late-night dinner at Bond 45, and a fun, classic brunch at Ellen’s Stardust Diner. But by far, my favourite dining experience was The View. This revolving restaurant is on the 48^th floor of the Marriott Marquis and offers a 360-degree view of the epic NYC skyline. To get there, you have to take an elevator that looks and feels like a ride at Universal Studios. The food was phenomenal and the view was even better (hence the name). We spotted the Chrysler Building, the Empire State Building, the NY Times building, and more historic features of the world-famous skyline. We could also see into some hotel rooms… Friends fans, brace yourselves—I saw an ‘Ugly Naked Guy’ in NYC!! (I couldn’t tell whether he was actually ugly. He probably wasn’t. But he was naked, and he was dancing.)

We spent most of our days strolling the streets or taking advantage of hop-on-hop-off tour buses; spotting iconic buildings and storefronts from history books and our favorite movies and television shows. We explored Fifth Avenue, Rockefeller Plaza, Chelsea Market, and Times Square. We walked through Central Park at sunset. We went to the Top of the Rock and soaked in more incredible panoramic views of the city. We cruised along the Hudson River at sunset where we got another perspective of the skyline, saw the Statue of Liberty (and learned her powerful feminist backstory), and glimpsed the Brooklyn Bridge. We marvelled at the giant Rockefeller Centre Christmas Tree and sipped hot chocolate while a light snow fell. It was magical.

One morning, while grabbing a coffee at Friedman’s before heading out for that day’s adventure, I saw a new copy of the New York Times on the counter. The headline: ‘Trump Impeached’. I felt like I was part of history as it was being made. That day, we went to the Museum of Natural History. We soaked in so much information and saw some fascinating exhibits—but I will admit that I was a little disappointed that it looked nothing inside like it does in Night at the Museum or Friends. That evening, we saw Rock of Ages off-broadway. I laughed until I cried.

The highlight of my trip, however, was seeing Come From Away on Broadway. I am a proud Newfoundlander who grew up hearing about the tragic events of 9/11 and how the small communities surrounding my own opened their homes and hearts to stranded travellers. To sit in the Gerald Schoenfeld Theatre and watch a breath-taking, heart-wrenching, soul-warming performance in the city where the tragedy happened… well, it was really humbling. I felt a connection to NYC and New Yorkers.

Since COVID-19 reached pandemic status and started wreaking havoc on NYC, I’ve felt strong feelings that I never expected to feel. There is a line in the musical: “you’ve found your heart, and left a part of you behind.” There is a part of my heart that remained in New York. I wish there was something I could do to end the suffering, relieve the overwhelmed healthcare system, and revive the beautiful city that I was introduced to just four months ago. I wish there was a way Newfoundlanders could again open our hearts and homes to New Yorkers, just like we did in September 2001.

Please, if you can, donate to charities (anywhere in the world) that are working to fight COVID-19, support vulnerable people through this terrible time, or support essential workers. Please, please, obey physical distancing recommendations and follow the rules your government has put in place. Please, please, please, show kindness to your neighbours and check in on your loved ones. Be safe, stay healthy.

Sending my love and all the swell thoughts to NYC and all of you,

char

Where Was Linds?

April 10, 2020 | Leave a Comment

What a wild rollercoaster ride this last year has been! Char and I have both been so busy with school and enjoying the little things as much as possible. This led to a break from twowildtides that we both felt we needed. We were both being pulled in so many different directions that we needed to take a step back. But here I am with an update on life and the future of twowildtides.

Life has taken so many twists and turns this past year especially for my path. I have kept my current journey relatively quiet and off of social media this past year. However, I moved to Ottawa to pursue my Bachelor of Education in the Junior/Intermediate Division which is Grade 4-10. Going back to school was a difficult decision that I toyed with for many months. However, sometimes you just have to take the plunge and go for it! I did. First and foremost I will always be an Actor but I’ve always enjoyed working with children and sharing my passion for the Arts + Athletics. I’m not sure where my career will take me but what I can tell you is that I love Theatre, I love telling stories, I love creating, I love acting and I love to teach. I feel the most myself, the most free, barefoot in a room of other artists – creating. My dream career will allow me to do all of those things simultaneously. That’s not too much to ask, right? (haha).

I moved into my shoebox sized, overpriced, questionably located apartment in Gatineau this past September. I made it my temporary home and it did have a cozy charm. I embarked on this new journey determined to incorporate the Arts in my teaching and work toward creating cross curricular lessons. Thankfully, I had the best placement in the entire world. I feel like I hit the jackpot with an incredible, diverse group of grade 4 students and an amazing Associate Teacher. Immediately, I was comfortable in this classroom, in this Middle School. My Associate Teacher taught me so much in such a short amount of time, helped me grow, gain confidence and gave me a lot of freedom.

I had an incredible highlight in November when I found out that my first play had been selected as a finalist to be workshopped in New Brunswick. A quick flight followed by a whirlwind weekend turned out to be a fabulous experience. My first play Tangent was workshopped and discussed. I heard my characters come to life for the first time. It was an incredible and terrifying opportunity. When your work is read aloud by other artists you really hear what’s working and what is definitely not. This weekend came at a time where I was feeling creatively disconnected and it was exactly what I needed. My play is still developing and changing. I submitted it to this workshopping opportunity on a whim and was thrilled to have been selected. Moral of the story: always apply, always send in your work even if you don’t have the qualifications and even if you think it’s sh*t. Chances are it’s a lot better than you think it is and anything you’re passionate about is worth a shot! After less than 48 hours in Saint John, NB it was back to Ottawa!

Throughout the Fall I had the opportunity to spend every Wednesday in the classroom. I felt ready and eager going into my December practicum. The first week went smoothly with many lesson learned and small victories. This practicum taught me so much about appreciating the small things, the little wins (that are actually HUGE) and finding the positives in every day. The Sunday before week #2 while at a matinee movie, my stomach started killing me. I tried to brush it off and thought it must just be one of my Chronic Illnesses acting up. I’m so accustomed to being in pain that it wasn’t a new symptom. By the time we got home, I was keeled over unable to move all afternoon. I literally needed help to walk but I kept brushing it off as Chronic Illness pain. My boyfriend repeatedly asked if we needed to go to the hospital. I insisted that I was fine. As I was curled up in bed that night, I looked at him and said watch it be my appendix. We both laughed thinking that was absurd. Nathan had to get up around 4:30am to drive to work. When he woke up in the morning – he asked again if I needed to be dropped off at the hospital. I said no. I didn’t sleep a wink. It hurt to roll over. Two hours after he left, I hobbled down to the car and drove myself to the hospital. I swear I’m the most stubborn person in the world.

Once I arrived at the hospital, I spent most of the day in the ER being called in and out. I had so many different tests including the most painful ultrasound of my life. Finally, the Doctor called me back in standing at his work station he looked at me and said it’s your appendix. Deep down I think I had known that fact all along. He proceeded to tell me that I would be admitted for emergency surgery. I remember saying “So I guess I’m not leaving tonight, eh?”. He said “No.” with a chuckle. The Nurse proceeded to hook me up to an IV and I dragged it behind me as I called Nathan’s friend to ask him to fill him in (Nate’s phone was broken). He hopped back in the car (which he had already packed because deep down I think he knew too) and arrived at the hospital just over 2 hours later. Shortly after he arrived I got a room upstairs and was officially admitted.

We waited together for a while before they came to take me to the OR. A couple hours later I was back in my room. The Doctors and Nurses were so kind and even hunted down a Jello cup for me the next morning. I was up walking relatively quickly trying to show them that I was ready to get out of there. By noon the next morning I was discharged. We went home and I slept like a baby. The recovery was quite painful as they had pumped me full of CO2 during the surgery. Let me tell you feeling gas bubbles in your shoulders and ribcage really sucks. After the first few days I started to feel a little better. It took longer than I anticipated to feel 100% and I still have to remind myself to be gentle with my body. Due to where the 3 incisions are my belly looks a little different than it used to and I’m still learning to accept those changes. Our bodies are so strong and the tasks that they can accomplish are incredible. I’m still working on being thankful for my body and all that it has/continues to do for me. It’s easy to get caught up on how your body looks or what you dislike but I (try to) remind myself that this body has also helped me win gold medals, complete the Salkantay trek in Peru and has taken me across 6 continents. At the end of the day those are the things that are important but sometimes they’re hard to see.

Luckily I had healed up enough that I was able to make it back for my last few days of Practicum. It felt so good to get out of the house and move around. I was really grateful for that time with the students. On the last day of Practicum I hopped on a plane to BC for a warmer, rainy Christmas. I got to spend the holiday season with my BF’s family and friends which was a lovely experience. We got to explore Vancouver Island a little bit and even made a quick day trip to Vancouver to see my cousin. I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I really missed my parents, family and friends (because I did & still very much do) but I was grateful to be welcomed in to new traditions and experiences.

After a fun, busy Christmas break in British Columbia, it was back to school. I had one course second semester that I absolutely loved. It was so refreshing to have a course that I looked forward to and I genuinely wanted to learn as much as possible. The course was First Nations, Inuit & Metis Education. I learned so much and felt grateful to have the opportunity to engage with the subject matter. I was also frustrated at how little I truly knew before the course – a mixture of the lack of Education that I had in public school on these topics but a large portion also fell on my shoulders. I realized very quickly that I need to continue to actively seek out opportunities to interact and learn from/with these communities. This course ignited something in me and I’ve made a commitment to continue to educate myself while also finding ways to Indigenize my classroom.

Second semester also allowed me to have even more time in the classroom as I was making up time lost from my appendix surgery. I cherished those days because I felt like they were teaching me so much, plus, I loved learning from/with the students. As COVID-19 currently sweeps the country and the planet, our everyday activities have come to a halt (rightfully so). I’m so grateful to those that are working on the front lines of this pandemic. THANK YOU. I also feel incredibly grateful that I’m able to stay home. However, these cancellations brought abrupt endings to many of our plans and it’s okay to grieve those missed opportunities. I’m feeling really sad that I won’t have the chance to say good-bye to my first class, to the grade 4’s that taught me so much about life, empathy and privilege. I won’t get that closure and neither will the students. I’m sad that I didn’t get to say good-bye to my Associate Teacher, to other Staff Members, to my peers and the amazing friends that I’ve made this year. We’re all living in this weird limbo land together.

All of that wordiness to say that I’ve had a bumpy year. It has had many twists and turns. We only scratched the surface in this article but I wanted to give you all an update. I’m grateful that I’m able to stay home. To those of you following the rules and staying home, and for those risking their lives every day to put food on our tables, delivering necessary products, working in health care settings: THANK YOU! This wild year has taught me so many lessons and I have had so many beautiful experiences. I’m grateful to have had the privilege of entering my second degree this past September. I’m grateful to be safely inside as I write this with food in the fridge, a safe bed to sleep in and the ability to FaceTime and connect virtually with so many family members and friends.

Moving forward twowildtides will be a place for our thoughts, experiences and things that are important to us. We won’t be following the rigour of a schedule but rather we will publish when we’re feeling inspired. Thank you for sticking around through all of our ups and downs. We look forward to connecting virtually with you through the blog. Sending big air hugs!

Congratulations if you made it all the way through that article! Love you all!

xoxo,

linds

Where Was Char?

April 6, 2020 | Leave a Comment

My last post on twowildtides was published in late September of 2019. Almost six months ago. We went from posting twice weekly to not posting for almost six whole months. We missed you. We missed twowildtides. But we don’t regret the break.

To even begin to describe where I went in September 2019, we need to rewind five years. September 2014. I had recently graduated high school and moved from a tiny town in Central Newfoundland to York University, in the Greater Toronto Area. It was my first semester of university, I was living in a fun residence with some beautiful girls (inside and out) including Linds, and I was studying for my dream job: photography. But I wasn’t having any fun. Why? Well, I certainly was feeling a whole lotta homesickness, but I think most people think that’s the end of that story. “She was homesick so she moved home.” Or at least, I thought that’s how people viewed me. I was also feeling: 1) disappointed that my big fancy art school dream wasn’t what it was cracked up to be, 2) bummed that the GTA is not Toronto, contrary to my small-town understanding, and 3) shocked and disoriented from the realization that I didn’t actually want to study fine art nor be a career photographer! So, I took those feelings and flew home after one semester. I am still so proud of myself for making that decision despite all the emotional tension surrounding me at that time. Do I regret going? Was it a waste of time? Absolutely not. If I hadn’t gone, I might still be on a path toward the totally wrong career for me. I wouldn’t have met Linds. And I always would have wondered what my life ‘could have been’ if I had just chased my dreams and gone to York University to study photography.

That December, I was left pondering some pretty existential questions for a 17-year-old. The most minor ones probably being ‘who am I?’ and ‘who do I want to be?’ (yeah, there was a lot going on in teenaged-Char’s head at that point). On Christmas Day, I was celebrating with family and my aunt, who is an amazing social worker, started talking about some interesting things happening at her work. Something clicked. It clicked in a way that photography, fashion, and the big city never did. I knew the path I was ready to explore. In the new year, I packed up again from my small town and moved to a much closer city (262 km to be exact): St. John’s. I started picking up courses at Memorial University such as psychology, sociology, and political science. I was learning so much and I was truly excited by what I was learning. I had my car. I was hiking and exploring in and around the city. I felt a freedom I hadn’t felt before. By the following September, a year after I started at York, I was enrolled in ‘Introduction to Social Work’ and feeling on top of the world. I finally had it figured out!

So, with my transcript highlighting all the prerequisites I needed, reference letters and personal statements organized impeccably; I applied to Memorial University’s Faculty of Social Work. I was strutting a pretty big walk from what I remember. I was class president in high school, I was accepted to fancy ol’ York University in ‘Tronno’, and I usually always got what I wanted. Good things happened to me. I was going to get accepted. (I’ve since learned a fancy word for all those things: PRIVILEGE).

It didn’t happen. Womp, womp. But I wasn’t denied admission. They didn’t even look at my application. Why? The cover page was missing from my package. THE COVER PAGE. I was humiliated, irate, devastated. I cried a lot, yelled a lot, beat myself up a lot, blamed the administration at the school a lot. I had an elaborate idea worked out about what happened to that cover page I was certain I had completed (it involved incompetent staff, lack of security cameras, and the school having undergone construction at the time I submitted my application). But the truth is, maybe I forgot it. Maybe. Or, maybe someone else lost it. Either way, I learned a hard lesson: sh*t happens and good things don’t always happen to you just cause you’re you. From there, I learned another important lesson: fight for what you want and what you believe you deserve. So, I fought. I wrote letters and held meetings and filed appeals. And then comes hard lesson number three: sometimes you can fight your hardest and strongest and you still don’t win.

I (bitterly) accepted my fate and continued studying. I had completed almost enough courses to graduate with a BA in Sociology when I got the news I’d been waiting for. My second application was accepted. I was in! It was 2017 and I had real classmates and faculty jackets and together, we had a fancy name: Memorial University Bachelor of Social Work, Class of 2020. I loved all of my courses. I invested myself in projects like I never had before. I worked and volunteered and applied everything I learned to what I was studying, building a portfolio and resume that I am really proud of (and don’t mind tooting my own horn about). I really liked my classmates, too. I made amazing, lifelong friends and even rekindled old friendships through studying social work. Together, we partied, fundraised, gave back to the community, and made plans for convocation. I worked my way through two exciting, fulfilling, and challenging field placements. We all worked so damn hard. I am so damn proud. Two and a half years flew by faster than I could have ever imagined.

So, here we are, September 2019, when I posted my last article on twowildtides. The last in-class semester of Memorial’s BSW program is in the last fall semester of the program and is arguably the hardest. Between putting my all into school, working and volunteering almost full-time, and maintaining a healthy social life; there was no time for twowildtides. I didn’t know my last post would be my last. It just stopped. Took a backburner. And honestly, I am glad it did. I can look back on the last year of my degree and say with confidence: “I gave it my all and I succeeded.” To me, this feels better than being able to say, “I balanced the most” or “I managed to get by with so much on my plate.” So, that’s where I’ve been!

Now we’re a quarter way into 2020. Today would have been my last day of my last field placement, which would have represented the last day of six long years of hard work and studying. There would have been a fun, wine-fuelled night out with a fancy dinner and a dance on George Street to celebrate. I would be officially registering as a professional social worker within the next month and walking across the stage in my cap and gown within the next two. Instead, I am social distancing. I am isolating myself from my family, friends, and classmates. Our field placement was cut short. Our convocation and gala are cancelled. No parties or celebrations in sight. We are in the midst of a global pandemic that is ending lives and economies. Social workers are needed now more than ever. All I want to do right now is get to work and help people. But, my classmates and I are caught in a limbo. We aren’t yet graduated, so we can’t register to work professionally. We must wait, and wait I shall.

I am incredibly privileged (there’s that word again!) to have good health, an amazing partner I live with and see every day, and supportive friends and family I can connect with virtually. I am so lucky that despite the situation in the world, I will graduate on time and receive my degree in a short while. I know that my situation is ‘better’ than many right now. But, I am allowed to mourn the plans I had made to celebrate my huge accomplishment. I am allowed to be sad about my ambitions for the next few months and years being put on hold. And so are you, for whatever you’re going through. We will get through this.

I did not expect my return to blogging to sound like what this article has morphed into. Mostly because six months ago I couldn’t possibly fathom our world looking this way, but partly because I just sat down at my laptop to say a quick ‘hi’ to everyone and here I am, three pages later, with so many different emotions poured into this document. This is what twowildtides might look like from now on. Linds and I writing what comes from our hearts, whenever it decides to come. We might not place such strict expectations on ourselves about when and how often we should be posting. We’re going to let the passion come back naturally. And we hope you’ll join us for the ride.

Lots of love and all the swell thoughts,

Char

Thinking of You, NYC

Where Was Linds?

Where Was Char?

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